"You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow,
"Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?... "What... You coming empty handed?"
****Wise Italian Grandfather****Why Italian Fathers and Grandfathers pass their hand guns down through the family.
"But grandpa, I really don't like guns... how about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?" "You lissin ame, boy. Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lots a money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos."
"Somma day you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with anotherr man.
"Whatta you gonna do then? Point at you watch and say, 'times up'"? ****
Irish blonde...An attractive blonde from Cork, Ireland, arrived at the casino. She seemed a little intoxicated and bet twenty
thousand dollars in a single roll of the dice.
She said,"I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude. "with that, she stripped from the neck
down, rolled the dice and with an Irish brogue yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!" As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up and down and squealed."Yes!Yes! I won, I won!" She hugged each of the dealers, picked up her winnings and her clothes and quickly departed.
The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded.
Finally,one of them asked,"What did she roll?"The other answered,"I don't know-I thought you were watching."
MORAL OF THE STORY
Not all Irish are drunks, not all blondes are dumb, ...but all men... are men!
Thank you for visiting and please come back, Arlene, Tango and Ruby